I guess I should start off with some introductions. To put myself in a few boxes (which I hate to do, but seems a necessary part of introducing oneself), I identify as a queer, 20-something, single, femme woman. I recently moved to the DC area, and though I have some friends here (and an ex-girlfriend), I’ve been making an effort to go out and meet new people as much as possible. My girlfriend of two years and I broke up about 4 months ago, and I’m enjoying my new single-dom. My love life has always been crazy and besides that relationship, which was FAR from drama-free, I tend to be single more often then not. I always feel whilst in long term relationships, that some part of my freedom and individuality gets slowly sapped. Someday, I want to find love (whatever that really means) and settle down, but for now I’m enjoying the freedom that single-dom brings and relishing the exciting, unpredictable nature of my love life.
This blog is intended to be an exploration of gender and sexuality as well as (hopefully) a serious of entertaining anecdotes from my rather chaotic and somewhat bumpy love life. I’m keeping my identity (as well as the identity of all other people mentioned in this blog) completely private, so that I can be more candid without fearing repercussions on my personal, professional, and romantic spheres. I decided to call myself “The Fierce Femme” because being femme has become a big part of my queer identity, although I’ve struggled with the label (This article expresses it more eloquently than I ever could: http://www.autostraddle.com/beyond-lipstick-143202/). To me, the word “fierce” implies confidence and strength – ownership of ones own body and identity and an unapologetic courage to be exactly oneself. While I don’t always live up to this, it’s something I strive toward. I like to think of myself as a confident person, and I’ve been trying to own my curves and to exude the sexy confidence I know is hiding within me somewhere. Sometimes I feel like a strong, beautiful, sex-goddess, but sometimes I look in the mirror in doubt and tell myself over and over again that I am beautiful, wanting to believe it so badly as I obsess over my weight or my height or my skin and wonder why that girl I met last week hasn’t texted me back. I think part of life is working toward loving oneself and feeling comfortable in ones own skin. I sincerely hope that I do not offend anyone in my writing. (If you feel offended, please let me know! – firstname.lastname@example.org).
This blog represents only my own unique perspective and experiences, and I do not intend it to be an all-encompasing, generalizing, or universal portrayal of the femme experience in any way. I want this blog to be a sex-positive, body-affirming, queer-positive space and I will try to be as cognizant of the many sensitivities within gender politics and sexuality politics as I possibly can be. I hope that my posts will be sometimes thought-provoking, sometimes poignant, and above all, both candid and entertaining. I’m writing this for me, first and foremost, but I also aspire to be a voice in the conversation to which some readers may be able to relate. I know I’ve found solace reading about the experiences of other queer femmes, and I hope I can be that voice for someone else. Happy reading!
-The Fierce Femme